009 Dialog between Mary and Ahzar

Azhar

Hello, thank you for visiting Huda TV. How may I help you?

Hi Mary.. warm welcome

Here we chat about islam basics

Mary

Hello

I need to know when islam talks about fighting what is this ?

What does it mean ?

Why is killing ok ?

Azhar

Sure. The only times Islam talks about fighting is in self defence and only after all the attempts at peace have been exhausted *AND* the enemy attacks you first

Killing anyone innocent in Islam is completely forbidden

And even when we are fighting… Islam tell us if our enemy asks forgiveness then forgiven them

Mary

but I read that Muhammad was fighting

And that he was acting like an army chief

And this confused me a lot .

Azhar

True – prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) did fight and was indeed chief of the army. However he made sure that strict rules were followed and only commanded to fight when the points I made above were true

Take an example…

When the muslims won and entered Makkah after a long time, the enemies were forgiven – except some who had been traitors or on both sides

Mary

I see

I am Christian

Orthodox Christian

Azhar

Nice to chat with you Mary

Mary

🙂

All my life I hated Muslims

Azhar

Are you in Athens? I visited it many years ago.

Mary

Mainly because I was told to .

Azhar

I can imagine many people do not like Muslims

Mary

Yes in Athens .

How did you guess ?

Azhar

Yes – there is a lot of resentment to Muslims. My system gives me an idea of your approximate location 🙂

Mary

🙂

The issue is that I was always close to God

And always away from my church

Azhar

I was in Athens in the days of those riots around 2009?

Mary

Yes yes 🙂

I remember the time !

Azhar

I hope things are better now !

Mary

Hope you enjoyed your stay .

Azhar

Yes – it was great

Mary

This are a lot better . At least we do not burn our city 🙂

Azhar

Hahaha.

Good.

Mary

🙂

Azhar

SO back to you…

As you were saying.

Mary

I was away from my church .

Azhar

How come you were away from the churhc?

church

Mary

I though that the priests were not that holy

Azhar

OK – LOL I guess there are similar ones in any religion

Mary

And everytime I needed them I didn’t think their consulting brought me close to God .

Azhar

I can understand that

Mary

I also was not sure that Jesus was Son of God .

Azhar

Wow – really?

Mary

Yes .

I thought that they made it such so that people would believe easier .

Azhar

As you know we love Jesus as a noble prophet of God but don;t believe he was God in human form or Son of God

Mary

But this did not make my faith smaller

Azhar

I got you.

Mary

So I still believed in God .

And God assists me in my life .

Azhar

SO you continued to investigate and research?

Mary

Even if I had difficult years he assisted me .

Azhar

It seems he guided you here – so that;s good 🙂

Mary

The truth is that I don’t remember an era that I was without troubles .

So some time ago

I met a boy .

Azhar

SOmetimes we need challenges in life to bring us closer to God

Mary

A Muslim boy .

Azhar

ok

Mary

And I started reading about Islam

He didn’t make me

I did it to assist him through a hardship he had .

And as he went more into the hardship I was reading more .

Azhar

Wow – that’s amazing

Mary

If one day we were together I knew I would have to convert

So I was thinking about it as being Christian but raising my children as Muslims

Azhar

Very interesting

Mary

So in a way doing both .

Azhar

And still the same?

Mary

And everything was going really bad with him

So his hardship made us away

Or me

Azhar

ok

Mary

I am not sure .

And I kept reading

Watching videos

Azhar

please go on

Mary

I though that through that I could find a way to ease his pain

So one day I saw a video and I heard the word partners

And in the beginning I said to myself

What are they saying ?

Why is this bad ?

Azhar

ok…. by the way.. your English is great!

Mary

🙂 thank you

And then I understood that in every and each pray I was making

I was praying to Jesus and not to God

And I have never realized that .

Never .

Azhar

Awesome you realised

Mary

So I said I have to start saying God

Then I read that sex before marriage is not allowed .

So I said why ?

Azhar

Yes true

Mary

Everybody is doing it

This is a very old idea

That it is not allowed .

And one night during a pray

I realized that I have never felt secure with a man

That I was using sex to seduce

And to be loved .

Did not work by the way 🙂

Not for me …

Azhar

ok

Mary

So I started reading the Quran

And it was so much easier than I expected .

I could read it for hours and not understood that the time had passed

Azhar

That’s great

Mary

And I cried .

And sometimes I felt it was written for me .

And then I started research for my religion

Not really research

Questions were coming to my mind

Questions based on things I had read some time ago .

And I just know remembered to search for the answer.

Azhar

This is just amazing.. please continue

Mary

And I found out that my religion is based on politics

And that people I worshiped

Chose the books inside my bible

Azhar

I didn’t get that bit.

Mary

There are supposed to be more people that wrote about Jesus

As Thomas

Azhar

oh yes..

Mary

Or Maria Magdalene

And they chose not to put them in the Bible .

Azhar

Gospel according to x, y or z person

Mary

Yes .

So in the beginning I said I am Muslim

I always were just didn’t know it .

Azhar

i understand

Mary

But know

As I read

I get so tired

So confused

My mind is thinking why would God write a book and send it down

?

If he is so powerful why does he care ?

Why do I feel so tired ?

Azhar

It’s a valid point.

Mary

I feel that I am losing my faith .

Why would the God of love

Want to punish us?

How can he be so cruel ?

Azhar

ok

Mary

If a bad person was next to me I would try to change his mind

Not burn him forever .

So I think I am losing my faith .

Azhar

Sure – i know what you mean.

Mary

I say to myself that I will never make it to heaven of l this is true

So why bother ?

And I keep crying .

And I always think about that .

Azhar

OK. And you came here to discuss this?

Mary

yes

Azhar

Cool

Mary

My religion seems to be fake .

I believed in a lie .

I don’t know what is true what is wrong

Azhar

When you say ‘your religion’ which one are you referring to?

Mary

Christina

christian

Azhar

Ah ok

Mary

I am

doomed

Either I believe in a fake religion or God is a lie or I will never make it in a Christian society

All the roads

I don’t see the light …

Azhar

OK. And what happened to the reading of the Qu’ran etc – do you still read it?

Mary

And I am so tired .

Yes I still read it .

I can not stop .

And I am tired .

Azhar

And what happens when you read it?

Mary

I keep thinking

I can not stop reading it .

Azhar

Surely there is a sign there??

Mary

What do you mean ?

Because I can not stop ?

Azhar

I mean if something is bad – why would you keep reading? Obviously its something good – a good message inside… and that’s why you can’t stop;

Mary

I am afraid when I am reading

Or ideas that God is not real

That this is a nice fairytale

And then

Azhar

Or because you feel scared that you are doomed?

Mary

I read some verses that “kill me”

Yes I am scared because nothing can save me .

And I cry .

Azhar

OK.. in this case I have good news for you!

Mary

Now I am crying .

Azhar

Please don’t. There is light and its close by.

Allah is willing to forgive ALL sins even shirk if we repent sincerely and we do it while we are alive.

Shirk – taking of partners alongside God

Mary

But I am thinking that he doesn’t exist .

Azhar

Ah I see.

Mary

And that I should better watch Tv

And I wake up tired .

Azhar

OK.. and this relates back to why would God be cruel to send people to hell fire?

Mary

Yes .

Azhar

I got you now

OK. There is a way to look at this differently

Mary

How ?

Azhar

As you know God can do whatever he wants….

So he can put people in hell fire for a few mins, hours or days – even years and then take them out. Right?

Mary

Yes .

Azhar

SO this is a possibility. Just like a parent can tell a child off and maybe even slap them – but still loves them

Mary

But the Quran says he doesn’t love unbelievers .

That he will set on Fire the ones who had partners .

Azhar

Right. Now imagine. If someone denies the messages and the guidance that God sends then God owes them no favour. Have you heard about Jehovah’s witnesses?

Mary

No . Or maybe I have wi

and we call him differently

Azhar

OK so it’s a Christian sect. And what they believe is there is no hell.

However the sinners do not get to see God.

Now in in the Qur’an – the Quran even itself says that it gives descriptions of hell and heaven that people might understand with their limited human imaginations.

So for example… hell might not have fire in it. It could be simply you are not able to see the face of God.

No -one knows right?

Mary

But it says you will have fire

And fire will eat your skin

And then you will have new skin for the fire to burn .

Azhar

Doesn;t it also say rivers of milk and pleasant gardens etc?

Mary

I will never be perfect .

Yes .

Azhar

Well we have those on earth already right?

Or we could have

Mary

Yes .

Azhar

So you see – as I think of it its like this:

Heaven/Paradise is a place we would want to stay in forever

Hell is a place we would not want to even be in for a second

And just think of it like this.

NOw imagine… if you gave your child a sweet one day.

And then the child loved it and he kept asking for it again and again but you didn;t give it to him. For that child – hell is not having a sweet right?

Mary

Right

Azhar

So the Qur’an says it gives allegories and analogies. So do not take it literally. I mean it says we will sit back on green cushions. We can do that here on earth!

My point is this…

Mary

I understand.

Azhar

We are each of us responsible for what we do for things that are in our control. We will be judged on those. And each will be doing it for himself. So just do the best you can and let others worry about their own salvation. Of course we should help others by conveying the message and guidance of God but if they want to block their ears then God might give them a slap or two or even something worse. What do we care when we have done the best we can for ourselves and to help them too?

Mary

Why do I have so many bad thoughts ?

Why isn’t God assisting me ?

Azhar

It may well be that God forgives those people in the end- who are we to resist?

Mary

Why do I feel so tired ?

Azhar

Mary… I think I can help you here. I have two recommendations – techniques you can use to reduce or eliminate these thoughts:

A: Use the following method in your daily life outside prayers and for when you get a sexual urge, evil or distracting bad thought: Keep a teaspoon in the left or right pocket. Whenever you catch yourself thinking a negative thought, move it over to the other pocket. Do this without exception. Over time you will notice that you kick out the negative thought before it has a chance to be fully formulated in your mind. The first couple of days you will constantly have to move it back and forth between your pockets. After a month, sometimes less, it becomes a habit and you develop the reflex to dismiss negative thoughts, no sweat. If after a while they do creep back in, put the spoon back in your pocket and scoop them away.

B: This is like a virtual ‘spank’ to yourself when you get a sexual urge, put off prayer or anything else… put a rubber band around your wrist… whenever you get a lazy thought, pull the rubber band and release it… this will hurt your wrist a little. Over time you will stop doing the bad stuff because your brain associates bad stuff with the rubber band pain.

The above tips very effective and known to work and can be used in other aspects of your life. They are cheap to implement but you will need to make an effort.

Try them. Nothing to lose!

Mary

I will .

I hope they will work .

Azhar

No harm in trying right? Cool. Now let’s discuss your beliefs a minute if that;s OK.

Mary

Ok

Azhar

So you mentioned that you used to believe as muslims believe (except lately you had doubts) – is that correct?

Mary

Yes . In a less conservative way of course .

Azhar

Right… OK.

Mary

Meaning I never thought that having sex is a bad thing

I thought that asking from God a good spouse is a sin .

Azhar

OK.. but when you read the Qur;an and realised it might be bad – what did you think and do?

(sex outside marriage)

Mary

In the beginning I though it was crazy .

Stupid

Azhar

Yes – I remmeber you mentioned it above.

Mary

That it had to do with the fact this was written in another age .

Azhar

But after thinking you accepted it?

Mary

You see my boyfriend is very conservative

And sometimes he had difficulties touching me .

So I was wondering why

Azhar

Yes I can imagine.

Mary

Want I good enough ?

He was saying this is out of respect

I though it was because he didn’t have enough girlfriends

So no i did not accept it

But one day , I was praying

And while on my pray

I just understood

Why I did it . How it felt .why he didn’t want to do it .

Azhar

OK great. Here’s something interesting related to the same thing that often happens…

Mary

I just understood .

Azhar

Ok… I get you. Often what happens is a muslim guy is dating a non muslim lady and then muslim lady starts getting interested and then decides that the guy is not really a good practicing muslim… she converts to islam for God and then ends up splitting from him!

(lady gets interest in Islam)

Mary

🙂

I can imagine .

But he is good .

He thinks now that I am the devil

Azhar

OK cool. LOL re devil

Mary

Or something like that .

But he is good .

Azhar

So look here is something else to think about

Regardless of what you believe we are here on the earth right now.

Now we can try to think of reasons why we are here. But looking at the sophistication of the universe and our bodies and DNA etc its almost impossible to think we just live and then die and there is nothing more to life than that – correct?

Mary

Yes . Correct

Azhar

So what is our purpose then – why are we here. In order to answer that question, we can try to think of a few reasons e.g. to make life better or our children or our descendants or make them stronger and more adaptable e.g. evolution. But its still no use to us when we are dead. Plus the fact that there is so much injustice in the world there must be some sort of universal justice or compensation. Right?

Mary

Right .

Azhar

Good = now to examine the reason for our purpose we can invent our own reasons or go with those of an established religion. In order to find the right established religion we need to find out if the person who started it or told us about it is genuine.

Mary

Sounds right .

Azhar

Also we need to look at the beliefs that those people brought. It should ideally be a good mix of spirituality and practicality.

Something you can apply in this world

Most religions are purely spiritual (e.g. love your neighbour) without giving you practical guidance.

Mary

Yes I noticed islam is not like that .

It gets to details.

It says even how to separate the fortune if somebody dies .

This is very surprising .

Azhar

Right… exactly. You always know where you stand – well in about 95% of cases.

So what I want to ask you is this: If you believe in say 70%-80% of the Qur’an and what it says… what else comes close? And what percentage of that do you believe??

Mary

It is not the Quran that I don’t believe .

I don’t like that Muhammad seems so important

He reminds me of how we have Jesus

Azhar

OK. Cool. I can help you with this for sure. There is a grat documentary on the life of Prophet Mohammed. It’s a neutral bography.

great

Mary

Ok he was the last prophet . But he was a prophet , right ?

Azhar

Its made by the BBC

Yes he was a prophet

Mary

Which documentary ?

Azhar

Here’s a link to the video on Youtube worth watching later – please save it….

BBC DOCUMENTARY ON PROPHET MOHAMMED:

Mary

Ok I will

Azhar

Now once you see how he was and how he had nothing to gain materially from anyone coming to Islam you can appreciate the authenticity of his message – a good messengers should act and talk like a true messenger in order to be trusted right?

Mary

Right .

But in Islam he is treated to be extremely important .

I don’t think that any of them

Azhar

Of course because he was the final prophet. Here’s an example of his honesty…

Mary

Any of the prophets was humble

Azhar

All were. Prophet Mohammed told us Jesus Christ will come back before the end of time to help save the world and make it muslim!!

Mary

Ok now that I remembered

Azhar

Now imagine a fake prophet or person after recognition.. he would have said that he (Mohammed) will come back at the end of time

Mary

How fair is that ?

Why Arabs have known the Quran

And Europeans haven’t ?

How fair is that ?

Azhar

You mean why is Qur’an in Arabic?

Mary

No It is an example

It is famous in Arabia for instance

But not in France

How fair is that for France ?

How can they know ?

How can I know ?

Just by luck .

Azhar

It could have easily been in any other lanuage and to any other people… then you would have been asking me why French people know the Qur’an and not Arabs!!! 🙂

Mary

Hehehehe

Azhar

God only knows!

Mary

I meant that God did not make it in equal terms

Azhar

It had to be in at least one human language for sure

Mary

Yes sure .

Azhar

But nowadays we can translate it

So no problem

Mary

But why Christians will go to hell ?

You know we have a saying

About religion in Christianity

It says

“Believe and do not investigate”

Azhar

We believe people who followed the original message of Jesus which was to worship one and only one God will go to heaven

Mary

They told me when I was very young and asked what is the difference between Holt spirit and God

But it says in the Quran Christians will go to hell

Azhar

Actually it doesn’t say that exactly. It says those who do not believe in one and only one God and do not believe in the last day may go to hell

There were people from the time of Jesus who knew nothing about prophet Mohammed that will go to heaven

Some call them Christians

Mary

So the translation that I have is not good .

It puts the pagans in the same situation as Christians .

Ok ok I see

Azhar

Yes – these are effectively atheists who do not believe in one and only one God.

Mary

We pray to Jesus .

Azhar

Yes – that is considered a big sin in Islam

Mary

But you know this is how they thought us .

I never realized that before now .

Azhar

Well we have been taught many things and beliefs we know are not true

Mary

In Jesus and in the saints .

Does Islam has saints ?

Azhar

Many Muslims have made saints out of good pious people but they’re not supposed to. So Mary… its was

So Mary.. its way past my prayer time.

I was wondering if we can resume in a while please if you have time? Or chat another day?

Mary

Yes of course .

It is also late here .

Azhar

Thanks. Cool. Usually I’m available at this time. I’m sure we will be able to continue this great chat.

Please try those techniques

Mary

Yes 🙂 the spoon !

Azhar

And watch that video.

Mary

Thank you for your assistance !

I will !

Azhar

ANy spoon will be fine – someone asked me if it has to be plastic or metal!

Hahahaha

Mary

Hehehehe

Azhar

OK – I will head off now and wish you a pleasant evening. May God guide you and keep guiding you to the right path.

11:08:58 pm

Mary

Thank you 🙂

For everything .

Azhar

God bless you! Bye for now.

Mary

Bye !